“Miss Piggott has swine flu. Official.” Well that’s what Angus Burton shouted when he charged into the class today. Mrs Clayton, our head teacher popped in to say that Miss Piggott did indeed have flu but it was doubtful whether it was swine flu and in case Miss Piggott HAD NOT BEEN ANYWHERE NEAR MEXICO so there was NO NEED TO PANIC. Angus Burton said that he saw Miss PIGGOTT at the MEXICAN TAKEAWAY at the weekend so he had PUT TWO AND TWO together. He suggested a RED CROSS WAS PAINTED ON HER DOOR like they did in the plague days so that passersby and postmen would give it a WIDE BERTH.
Ram who is a Hindu and whose dad is a human rights lawyer and used to be the British Ambassador to Somalia told him NOT TO MAKE CLAIMS WHICH COULD NOT BE SUBSTANTIATED. My mum thinks that Ram is the VOICE OF REASON in our class. Ram also said that we could USE THE OPPORTUNITY TO STUDY VIRUS REPLICATION AND HOW GOOD HYGIENE AND HEALTHY EATING MIGHT LIMIT THE EFFECTS. This is good news for my GREEN EARS.
In assembly Mrs Clayton talked about the importance of sharing. She said THERE WAS A LOT OF PERSONAL SATISFACTION TO BE GAINED BY SHARING. When she’d finished she asked if ANYONE HAD ANY QUESTIONS? Angus Burton put up his hand and said HE WOULD GET A LOT OF PERSONAL SATISFACTION IF HE COULD SHARE HIS NITS WITH SOMEONE AS SOMEONE HAD OBVIOUSLY SHARED THEM WITH HIM. We all found that quite funny except the teachers didn’t.