Angus thinks it may have been an ENLIGHTENED CAT that escaped with the equivalent of SIX BIN LINERS full of dead, rare, exotic birds from PRIVATE CABINETS at the NATURAL HISTORY MUSEUM. What is known is that the SNATCHED BIRDS were DEFINITELY NOT PIGEONS .
Once upon a time you could buy a LITTLE TUB OF SEEDS to feed STARVING PIGEONS in TRAFALGAR SQUARE. Not today. There are so many pigeons now they are cruelly regarded as FLYING RATS. No one thought such VERMINOUS THOUGHTS when pigeons PUT THEIR LIVES AT RISK during TWO WORLD WARS. In fact, and this is A FACT, there was a time when
THE DICKIN MEDAL, which is the highest possible animal’s decoration for bravery, was awarded to 32 PIGEONS, including the US Army’s G I JOE and the Irish pigeon, PADDY (who got it for the best recorded time with a message from the Normandy Operations, while serving with the RAF in June 1944).
Today’s PIGEON PLIGHT would no doubt have OUTRAGED the WAR LEADERS as well as the Victorian ladies who WENT DOWN IN HISTORY after founding the RSPB – ROYAL SOCIETY FOR THE PROTECTION OF BIRDS. These GENTLE ECO LADIES of YESTERYEAR were ALARMED by the number of BABY BIRDS that were left to STARVE IN THEIR NESTS after their parents had been shot for their plumes. They got parliament to BAN THE USE OF EXOTIC PLUMAGE ON HATS (with the exception of the ostrich).
So, it is with some concern that Ram, Angus and I learn that 229 RARE TROPICAL BIRD SPECIMENS were stolen from the museum. Detectives fear the birds will be RIPPED APART and their brightly coloured feathers will be used used on FLY FISHING HOOKS or ON CLOTHING.
The BIG BIRDIE QUESTION is HOW DOES ANYONE KNOW THE DIFFERENCE between an exotic feather and any other?
We now intend to PETITION PARLIAMENT to PROTECT THE PIGEON. We regard it as an OUTRAGE that a PIGEON FROM BRITAIN whose ancestors sacrified their lives on the battlefield should be considered of LESS VALUE than A BIRD OF PARADISE from PAPUA NEW GUINEA. If a pigeon were to become rare – which is a possibility if they are STARVED TO EXTINCTION or GUNNED DOWN ON THE BATTLEFIELD – they would undoubtedly have THEIR OWN PRIVATE CABINET at the NATURAL HISTORY MUSEUM.
To encourage a MORE FAVOURABLE ATTITUDE TOWARDS PIGEONS we are suggesting that ALL PIGEON FEATHERS that are SHED NATURALLY should be collected, eco dyed and sold to fishermen and dressmakers – and – FROM THIS DAY FORTH, we expect to go down in history as THE FOUNDERS OF THE RSPP – the Royal Society for the Protection Of Pigeons.